current state of mind: quixotic
You say that you know
Where to find the flaws in my armor
You whisper, ‘don’t act surprised
I’ll never tell’
~ “Running of the Bulls” by Red Wanting Blue
Blah. Many moons ago, I read Don Quixote. I read it in Spanish (and in English). I vaguely remember the details (in Spanish) and they are not helpful because I remember very little of the Spanish that used to be in my brain. It is likely still up there – but I cannot locate it without the help of a hypnotist. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is that I learned to never wage battle against windmills in order to win the heart of a whore. Wait . . . that cannot be what that book was about. I know that there was more to it. Dulcinea (a farmgirl, not a whore) and Sancho Panza (some little fat guy who was nice to the old man) and a really skinny horse and the niece who burned the books and . . . okay, it is slowly coming back to me. Not quick enough to hold my interest, however. So, let’s just say that you can read it if you want and learn that it is ridiculous and irresponsible to be a dreamer about things that are not as you want to see them. That Cervantes guy was pretty darn smart.
Before y’all begin thinking that this post is about being disillusioned – it isn’t. I just enjoy the word “quixotic” and wanted to use it as my state of mind above. Using the word made me think of the origin and then I remembered reading that novel. One firing synapse after another brought us to this point. What amuses me, however, is just how far this stream of consciousness could go if I allowed it. For example, while I was learning the vocabulary necessary to interpret Don Quixote, a girlfriend used that list to send a postcard to a guy she met in Spain. I must say that talking about las espuelas to some guy across the pond may not have been the wisest move – but, he had no complaints, I am sure.
From there we can move to foreign love affairs and being 19 and wondering how it all went by so fast. How did I go from someone who truly was quixotic to someone who looks at the world through the eyes of a logical, analytical, realist? I would never want to go back to being that girl . . . but I am curious how she disappeared so efficiently. Maybe she used LEAN. Hahahahahahaha! That really did crack me up.
Anyway, I should probably stop drinking and writing now. (I am not actually drinking)
PERSONAL NOTE: Sorry I was cranky with you. There was no reason for me to throw that in your face.
CONFIDENTIAL NOTE: I’ll think about August and see what I can manage. I appreciate the invite. SWU!