11 August 2008

Lady Luck is Not in My Corner

My weekend -- wow, where to start?  Friday, I went to dinner at one of the local casinos (aka. racketeering establishments).  To clarify, I was with two lovely ladies, and dinner was so much fun!  The food was excellent and the conversation was entertaining.  However; from there the fun came to a stand-still. 

I actively dislike casinos.  To me, they are places where the retired gamble away their social security checks and the poor lose their mortgage payments.  Perhaps I am cynical in this regard - but I know that my luck is limited at Casinos.  And nothing pisses me off more than walking up the stairs on the boat to view the COUNCIL BLUFFS HARRAH's WALL of WINNERS!  Really?  a wall of winners?  All of them, with their smug little smiles, holding onto their winnings.  Jim Bob won $12,465 and Sally Jane won $25,000.  All, while I am mourning the loss of $15.00 (which was in the form of a voucher, not even real cash.) 

After losing my voucher in a penny machine that I didn't even know how to play -- I wandered the decks - watching people win and lose -- playing random games of chance which require very little concentration.  The drinks were free and constantly being delivered to people who were mesmerized by the animated characters on the screens.  I found the situation sad and depressing and was very pleased when it was time to leave.  Hopefully, I will not have to return to the Devil's Den for some time.  I think I would rather shop at Devil Mart than 'play' at the casino.

Friday Night -- done!

Saturday, I was supposed to go out of town -- but circumstances beyond my control changed that so instead I went out with friends.  And that was a good time.  I ran into some people I hadn't seen in a while - and overall had no complaints until I was on my way home. 

8 blocks from my new house - I dropped my car stereo remote on the passenger side floor.  It was a little past 2am and the street was abandoned.  I reached down to pick it up. . . mistake #1!

As I was leaning down, I inadvertantly pulled the steering wheel to the right a little . . . mistake #2

Mistakes #3 and #4 came rapidly thereafter, first hitting the curb, then the fire hydrant. . .

Now, for mistake #5 - which sort of clinched the situation, I yanked the steering wheel left to regain control of the car!

What happened thereafter was no longer my mistake, per se. . . instead it was more the results of the formentioned events.

Yanking left on the wheel merely overcompensated the intended correction - which greatly unbalanced the vehicle I was driving.  Unbalanced it to the point that it was no longer - how should I put it? - upright.  That's it!  The car was no longer upright - in fact, if we are being precise, it wasn't really upside down either.  It was more a combination of the two but, with motion.  I watched out the windshield as the neighborhood went upside down, then right side up rather rapidly. 

My equilibrium was a little off-center; but I think it is safe to say that the vehicle rolled at least once.  When it came to a stop, I was parked in some nice people's driveway.  The previously mentioned fire hydrant, was on its side.  And before you ask -- NO, the water was not spraying everywehere.  As the kind officers explained, the city of Omaha has built its fire hydrants in such a way that when one is removed from its base, the valves do not break.  So -- no shower of H2O to add to the mix.

 Once I was cognizant of the car no longer moving, I relaized that both air bags had gone off.  Neither of them, hit me, but the smell of air bag powder is still in my nose.  The contents of the car were a little rtatled and strewed all over.  With the exception of my can of diet coke, which was sitting, peacefully in the cup holder.  My work badge was lodged in the steering column. 

I opened the car door, to see a nice family standing there, staring at me.  I was unhurt - but not quite 'all there' as I had just been tumbled.  The events after my acrobatic trip were routine for anyone who has ever flipped their car after taking out a fire hydrant -- so I will not recap them.  

The kind police officers reiterated several times that I am lucky to be alive.  That cars are replaceable, people aren't.  And that my reckless driving court date will be next month. 

Two days later, I am in a rental car.  I cnanot drive past the accident site.  When I get within 2 blocks, I am overcome with nausea and must drive out of my way to avoid going down that section of the street.  I am bruised in places I did not know could be bruised.  My shoulder is a wondrous rainbow of colors and scrapes.  Thank you, Seat Belt, for most of the marks.  Still, I suppose it's better than having my head go through the windshield.  Not complaining too much!

The car is in bad shape.  I'm not so sure they'll fix it.  In fact, I'm pretty sure they won't.   So, now I need to find a new car - preferably one that is armoured.

There's my story -- hope you found it as entertaining as my insurance company did.  As an added bonus, I go to Physical Therapy tomorrow, as well as to see the Orthopedic Specialist - who will no doubt - compliment me on my ability to destroy 6 months of rehabilitation in 30 seconds.  At least this time, I will remember to wear panties to the appointment!

If you have any further questions; let me know!  

PERSONAL NOTE TO A FRIEND:  Congratulations on your engagement! That news made this weekend worth it all!  I love you, girl!

Eidetic Vision

Main Entry: ei·det·ic Pronunciation: I-'det-ik Function: adjective : marked by or involving extraordinarily accurate and vivid recall especially of visual images - an eidetic memory Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, © 2002 Merriam-Webster, Inc.