31 October 2008

Cousins. . . Identical Cousins – NOLA Part III

Current mood: bouncy

I don't want to get you all worked up
Except secretly I do
I'd be lying if I said I didn't have designs on you
I'd be lying if I said I didn't have designs on you
~ "Designs on You" by Old 97's

Waking up Saturday morning was not a treat! First off, Ali-Son kept stepping on my sleeping mat; second, I think I was still drunk – yet experiencing a hangover at the same time. Our first stop was "Brothers" a convenience store that Ali-Son plans on buying and renaming "Cousins". We bought Dr. Pepper, some batteries for the camera, and a 1/5 of Bacardi, which I was somehow going to sneak into the park since the thought of more Hurricanes turned my tummy.

It was Roly Poly Nicoly's turn to be in the front seat, so I sat in the back, rearranging our belongings into our nylon Voodoo Fest backpacks. We stopped at New Orleans Hamburgers for lunch. There, we witnessed all kinds of shenanigans, including a vomiting 3 year old; two little boys who were very familiar with Obama; a little boy with the more gorgeous blue eyes and blonde curls; oh, and a Papa, with his daughter, and grandson. The food was good – unfortunately, the sunlight beat down through the windows and terrorized my hangover. I was so ready to leave when we were finally walking back to the car.

We had three goals for Saturday!

Be in the very front for the Old 97's (MY goal); throw panties and telephone number to Lil Wayne (NOT my goal); touch Trent Reznor in ways that cannot be discussed in this blog (MY goal).

Once we arrived at City Park, we recapped our goals and began the not quite as long of a trek. When we were by the sculpture garden, still a block or so from the entrance, a troupe of teenagers (gaggle; group; gang; whatevs), approached us and asked if we would be interested in some "E". At first I thought they had kidnapped my dog and were holding her for ransom; but then clarity happened and I realized that the youngn's were trying to cut a deal of a less nefarious sort.

I laughed at their offer and said they were sweet for caring; but that we'd be alright. Then one piped up, "you and me could have some fun with it". I literally laughed out loud and said, "Honey, you're a tad young for me I think." He disagreed and said that he was old enough to satisfy me. Ha ha ha Of course, I took the bait and asked him just how old he was. . . "I'll be 17 tomorrow". This gave me another case of the giggles as I told him I was driving before he was out of diapers. We wished them good luck in their drug dealing adventures and walked toward the gate.

I slipped the Bacardi into my jeans, and prayed it wouldn't fall through as security dug through our bags. We made it inside without incident and I began my day of Bacardi and Pepsi while RPN and Ali-Son bought more of those blasted hurricanes. It was already 2:30 or so by this point. We perused the vending tents for a half an hour or so. Some minor purchases were made. At 3, I told the girls I was heading over to the Old 97's stage and that they could join me or they could go get ready for Lil Wayne who was scheduled to go on at 4:20. Imagine that time choice!
They said they'd go check the crowd and come back if it wasn't too bad. I did NOT expect to see them again until after Lil Wayne. I wished RPN good luck on her panty throwing bit and I finished off my second Bacardi and Pepsi before walking to the SoCo stage where Rhett Miller would soon be playing guitar and singing directly to me.

Most of the audience was seated on blankets in the grass, which made my trip to the front an easy one. I stood directly in front of Rhett's microphone and waited, patiently for the Old 97's to take the stage. A guy standing next to me, wearing a Cracker shirt (the band, not the food), asked if I'd ever seen them live. I explained that it just hadn't been in the cards for me until that point and he explained that he'd seen them lots of times. We continued talking about bands and shows we'd seen until 3:30.

I screamed like a school girl when the show finally started. And several times, Rhett Miller looked directly at me with those incredible blue eyes and smiled. They were phenom and my voice was hoarse by the end. I have a ton of pictures and video footage of the Old 97's if anyone is interested. As Cracker-boy and I walked away from the stage, I could hear Lil Wayne in the distance. The thought of actually having to sit through that show nauseated me, so I elected to drink another Bacardi and Pepsi instead. Imagine my surprise when Cracker-boy accompanied me wherever I went for the next 2 hours.

It got to the point where I texted 2 different friends to call me and help me out of the situation – but both of those people FAILED me. And I know both of those people are reading this now and laughing at the uncomfortable situation in which they left me. All I can say to you two is payback is hell, bitches!

It wasn't until Ali-Son and RPN found me that I was able to detach the nice; but unsolicited appendage from my side. I think he would have been fins to chill with all day had he not kept pointing out people's tennis shoes and telling me which model number they were. It really got a little creepy after a while.

We needed to return to the car to drop some stuff off and run to get dinner before the Nine Inch Nails show. I found out on our walk to the car that RPN did not throw her panties – but she did almost end up in a huge fight with some big girls who didn't like the fact that she was closer to Lil Wayne than they were. Poor Roly Poly Nicoly – always getting picked on!

The End of Part III. Part IV will commence shortly!

Eidetic Vision

Main Entry: ei·det·ic Pronunciation: I-'det-ik Function: adjective : marked by or involving extraordinarily accurate and vivid recall especially of visual images - an eidetic memory Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, © 2002 Merriam-Webster, Inc.