current state of mind: perplexed
And the sun rose over the city
The wind swept through the valley
You don't get over a broken heart
You just learn to carry it gracefully
~ “The World Moves On” by Jens Lekman
I love to eat at restaurants – but I rarely bring home leftovers. The thought of reheating food that has been sitting out on a table (and then in a Styrofoam container) makes me gag a little. I do grant an exception for foods that do not require reheating. I will bring home pizza, fried chicken, bread, and desserts. Recently I visited a local pizza establishment and was asked if I wanted to bring the remaining pizza slices home. I accepted, because the pizza was damn tasty; however, I left the restaurant without the pizza box. The server came running into the parking lot to give me the abandoned pizza. Great Service! When I arrived home I placed the pizza box in my fridge; where it will sit until I remember to consume it or throw it out. Chances are the latter will be the case. Sad times.
As I type this, my tummy is growling rather loudly. Growling tummies are so embarrassing because people around me don’t know whether I am hungry or have serious gastrointestinal issues. I have to wonder if anyone else feels it necessary to state loudly, “Hmmm, my tummy is growling,” every time it happens. I know it is a silly insecurity – yet it is one I cannot seem to shake.
This is a monumental week for me. It was my birthday and it is also the week that includes the 14th and 9th anniversaries of my wedding celebrations. I suppose that I should use this time to reflect on the reasons why both marriages failed. The reality is, however, that I already know why they failed. I made a lot of mistakes. They made a lot of mistakes. Many of those mistakes were severe enough to irreparably damage the relationships. What I learned from both is that sometimes amazing, beautiful things end in ugliness – but after enough time passes, it is possible to look back and fondly remember the amazing, beautiful things once again.
This is why the human experience is so wondrous. Peace out!
PERSONAL NOTE: I am happy that you are back to being yourself again.
CONFIDENTIAL NOTE: I am sorry you are still in pain. I wish I could hug you right now.