He's connected to the sounds
And he's got pictures on the wall
Of all the girls he's loved before
And she knows all his favorite songs
~ “Flavor of the Weak” by American Hi Fi
I am dating someone. He goes by the pseudonym, ‘NBF’ (non-boyfriend). Our last 3 dates were very different fromone another:
The Holland Lecture Series ‘Dr. James K. Galbraith: The Great Crisis and the Predator State’ – a liberal-leaning economist who is possibly riding the coattails of his famous economist father. He talked about strawberry patches and blueberries (a reference to blue and red states). The lecture was interesting; the brownies made my tummy hurt.Recently, I introduced NBF to ‘Missed Connections’ on Craigslist. It is a place where people post messages to ‘missed connections’ such as the barista at the Starbucks counter or the guy who made eye contact with on the subway. I love the idea of having a missed connection, then finding the person again – perhaps spurring destiny toward a happier existence. The idea is romantic and fun. The reality, however, is generally much more pathetic. I used to date a guy who was some girl’s ‘missed connection’. They had chatted at the bus stop. She wanted to see him again. Granted, it is less creepy than stalking the bus stop for him. And, had he not been dating me at the time, perhaps he would have contacted her and they could have lived happily ever after. I could be the cause for destroying the opportunity of a lifetime. Maybe.
Dinner at the Cheesecake Factory then a movie, ‘Law Abiding Citizen’, starring Gerard Butler and Jamie Foxx. The concept was thrilling – but the execution and conclusion were lacking. Makes me wonder if Butler will ever be able to carry a film without another big name to back him up.
Movie – Zombieland. It was excellent. I highly recommend it. It’s a fun, yet somewhat grotesque romp. The dialogue is clever and the acting is quite inspiring. I laughed aloud and turned my head in disgust. Plus who doesn’t LOVE zombie movies? As an added bonus, there are no vampires. Great Date flick!
If you read through them, however, it becomes all too apparent that people are reaching at straws, in hopes that they can connect with someone, anyone. Sometimes, the descriptions are so vague that one has to wonder if there really was an interaction at all. In other situations, the messages are so specific that one is tempted to go to the place with a printout of the message to give the barista a little nudge in the right direction. Either way, I am curious as to whether or not these people ever connect.
Has our world truly devolved into a place where we cannot attempt to connect in person? Why are people so scared of rejection that they must go to an online site and post something that will most likely never be seen by the person in question? Next time, walk up to that counter and say, ‘hi.’ Introduce yourself. I have several friends who I never would have known had I just posted a ‘missed connection’ instead of introducing myself and been willing to talk to a perfect stranger.
I encourage you to step out of your comfort zone today and make a connection – it could change everything.
PERSONAL NOTE: Thank you for not being a ‘missed connection’
CONFIDENTIAL NOTE: The late night-chats are taking their toll.
SHOUT OUT: to all my peeps in Fort Worth whom I will see in one week!