13 April 2009

Stopped Counting at 42

Current Mood: smitten

When a person tries to kiss a girl
I know she aughta give his face a smack!
But as soon as someone kisses me
I somehow sorta want to kiss him back!
~ “I Cain't Say No” from 'Oklahoma' by Rodgers & Hammerstein

There is a lot to be said about kissing. As you may know, I kept a kissing spreadsheet until I was 22, documenting the name, age, location, and relationship status of every boy I ever kissed. My first kiss occurred when I was 14. It was May of 1991 and his name was Ben. Actually, I remember his full name; but to protect his identity, I will refrain from sharing it here. He was a soccer player and a year younger than me. He had brown hair, gorgeous eyes, and a smile that gave me flutter-byes. We met at an academic competition and he asked for my phone number. Then, on a Friday night, he and his friend came over to watch movies. Before they left, Ben stopped me in my living room, took both my hands in his, then leaned in and kissed me. His lips were soft and warm. The kiss lasted all of ten seconds. As far as first kisses go, it was perfect; and I hold kissing up to the standards set by the one I received that night. I don't know that I ever saw Ben again, after that night. My life was quite chaotic at that point - and my memories are blurred. I did, however, see mention of him over the next 4 years in the newspaper, as he was quite the athlete. I actually saw his marriage announcement in the newspaper several years back. He and his bride made an attractive couple. Per the newspaper, they live in Austin, TX. I am positive that he wouldn't remember me or our kiss. I'm okay with that.

I have had a few bad kisses as well. I'd like to think that they were caused by a lack of talent on the other person's side and not through any fault of my own. I mean, kissing is pretty subjective - but I like to think that on a scale of 1 - 10, I am close to a 9 on the kissing scale. I brush my teeth, keep my lips exfoliated and moisturized, and I never slobber all over the person I am kissing. If you have to wipe spit off your face after kissing someone, then you shouldn't be kissing that person.

I must admit that a large handful of kisses in which I have participated occurred when I was a little under the influence. In college, if I'd been drinking, someone was getting kissed. Usually, I didn't care who was present or where I was. I remember one party where I was sitting on the kitchen counter and saw a cute boy talking to one of his friends. Using my leg, I pulled him over to me and locked lips with him. Luckily, he didn't seem to mind - there are ten minutes of my life that would never have occurred if not for Mad Dog 20/20 . This habit has followed me into adulthood - though now, I am not generally the instigator. My friends do make fun of me, however, for getting kissed at the bar. I am talking random kissing - not pre-meditated. I will be talking to someone and they will just lean in and start kissing me. Completely unexpected - and for the most part, 100% unsolicited. I must look like someone who won't slap you if your mouth happens to come close to mine. Before you start to judge - these kisses have been witnessed and truly are unsolicited.

With discipline, and conscious effort, I have avoided such kisses in 2009. I found an incentive program that cannot be ignored!

PERSONAL NOTE: Hope that baby girl isn't kicking too hard! Cannot wait until she makes her appearance in the world!!!

CONFIDENTIAL NOTE: I slipped on a kiss and tumbled into love!

Eidetic Vision

Main Entry: ei·det·ic Pronunciation: I-'det-ik Function: adjective : marked by or involving extraordinarily accurate and vivid recall especially of visual images - an eidetic memory Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, © 2002 Merriam-Webster, Inc.