20 July 2010

Saying Goodbye

Current mood: grateful

But somehow she got a postcard in the mail
That just said Heaven with a picture of the ocean and the beach
And the simple words he wrote her
Said he loves her and they told her
How he'd hold her if his arms would reach
~ ‘Wish You Were here’ by Mark Wills

For the past few years, every time I left town, I would buy a postcard or two and send them to my grandpa. I had my friends bring back postcards from their travels, so I could mail those too. In fact, at this moment, I know that NBF has already selected some postcards in Europe for me to send to my grandpa. Unfortunately, they won’t get here in time for me to mail them. Still, on Saturday, I told my grandpa that they had been purchased so he knew they would be forthcoming. I told him how very much I love him and also how grateful I am for all of the love he has shown me. And then I said, ‘Goodbye’, reminding him that he owes me a postcard once he gets “there”.

I am blessed because I had grandparents through my entire childhood and well into adulthood. Most people are not so lucky. I have also been lucky enough to be able to say my farewells to one grandmother and one grandfather. My maternal grandmother was in hospice for some time and I visited her for that last conversation, one that I will treasure forever. And once again, time was on my side, and I was able to have that same experience with my grandfather. He will be gone soon, and I am comforted by our final words.

It was explained to me once that death is God’s way of making room on Earth for the next generation. I am ‘good’ with that logic. It makes sense to me. I don’t fear death or whatever happens after we leave this life. No matter how many doubts attempt to creep into my mind, innate beliefs reassure me that there is no finality to our love. My grandfather led an amazing life. He set examples that I will forever try to emulate. While I do not have his green thumb, I do have other legacies from him, which include a love of reading, learning, and being an overall, good person.

While I don’t expect to receive an actual postcard in the mail, I know that his message will get sent in one form or another. I eagerly await its delivery.

PERSONAL NOTE: Have an amazing time in Amsterdam!

Eidetic Vision

Main Entry: ei·det·ic Pronunciation: I-'det-ik Function: adjective : marked by or involving extraordinarily accurate and vivid recall especially of visual images - an eidetic memory Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, © 2002 Merriam-Webster, Inc.